Piercing Brown Fire
by suspensegirl
Summary: CB convo in 3x12 following the events at the hospital. Chuck apologizes again for the hurt he had been causing Blair. ONESHOT.


A/N: Christmas night and I have found time to write! *needed to make it rhyme XD* I've had this oneshot idea in my head, since I saw a brief little glimpse of some summary on a fic someone was starting based on one of the angsty earlier CB scenes in 3x12. Lately I've been reading fics that really lure me in by their two-sentence summaries but then end up being written not as well as I'd hoped. Therefore, I am hoping you enjoy this, because I wish to make the summary (hopefully it'll be good, lol) live up to its potential in the following story. This fic takes place in the limo ride home after the CB convo at the hospital, and before the cemetery occurrence at the end of the episode.

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_The doors parted further, and he could feel Blair's presence fill the room. His crossed fingers lay loosely across his forehead, and he did his very best to block out the light. But he couldn't ignore her caring, confused, worried gaze for forever. He raised his hands just above his shaded eyes to take a glimpse of the beauty in his doorway. _

_"Thought you were meeting me for lunch."_

_"I had too much to drink." _

_His face was covered again, his head turned away._

_"Oh, well," her face fell to her hands, "we'll just order room service."_

_Adjustment. Change of plans. A touch of hopeful vulnerability. It was dismissed with a hand rising from his head to gesture her way out of his current stance in life. _

_"Look, I really don't need you to take care of me."_

_It burned, and Blair swallowed hard. She made herself believe he didn't mean what he said, that she was worth it to him, that the day was just hard to remember – that his father wouldn't let him forget. _

_"I know how hard it was to let your guard down, to let me in, but you've changed."_

_Chuck removed the hands that had fallen back over his face and moved to a sitting position on the edge of his bed. The fight between his father's final acceptance and his love for Blair was weakening every action he took. The near eye roll he attempted at her reasoning seemed to give an unsure progressive nod from his ghostly father through the blurry glass._

_He was losing his mind, and he knew he had to get Blair out of there before he said something too reckless to mend, regardless of the day that weighed him down. He stood to his feet and straightened his jacket, making a disgruntled noise that would showcase annoyance._

_"I'm buying that building," he said, rubbing his eye from some fake tiredness he was hoping would make all of this just go away._

_"Chuck—"_

_Hurt turned to worry, and the deepest concern. He straggled towards her._

_"Don't tell me what to do."_

_"I'm not. Just talk to me."_

_The strain in her voice was clear, and he settled on avoiding eye contact and removing her hand to comfort him when they were inches apart. The brace he made of his own hand to the door was hardly enough to keep him standing for long._

_"Blair, I need you to get out of here, now."_

_"Chuck—"_

_"Now."_

_The eye contact was made, and in a frustrated almost teary gaze, Blair Waldorf left the apartment. Chuck turned against the sturdy wall and closed his eyes in his conflicting emotions. The ghost of his father came forth into the feet before him._

_"Hmm," Bart mused, "Maybe there's hope for you yet."_

~*~*~*~

Chuck's eyes blinked open and his vision cleared. He looked down to where his hand lay and found comfort in the warmth of Blair's fingers intertwined between his own.

"Blair," he said, barely a whisper.

"Hmm?" she asked, turning her head towards him. "Were you sleeping?" she tipped her head to the side, and allowed the corners of her lips to curve towards her eyes. Chuck's eyebrows furrowed and he looked at her in concern. Immediately a frown and worried brown spheres greeted his unpleasant thoughts. "What is—?"

"I'm sorry," he blurted.

Blair's lips parted and she found herself speechless to his words.

"About earlier…" he cleared his throat, bringing his other hand around to hold onto hers as well, "I shouldn't have said those things I said to you." He shook his head slowly, in disbelief of what he had done and said. Her eyes closed in understanding.

"Chuck, you were in pain," she said, her mind flooding back to their most recent conversation.

_"My father always thought I was weak, and in the moment that mattered most I was. I couldn't be there when he uh…" he paused, finding it too hard to finish the most obvious, most painful statement. "…I left, right away. I've been pushing myself to prove him wrong, and been pushing you away."_

"That doesn't excuse—" his fingers slipped.

"Chuck." Her other hand came to where their fingers rested and pulled his drifting limb away, tight, closer to where hers lay firm. His eyes flicked to hers.

"It hurt. I'm not going to lie and say it didn't."

Tears rested in his eyes.

"But you didn't mean it."

"No," he shook his head, "I didn't."

"And you needed reassurance."

"Yes," he nodded subtly, "I did."

"So, you're okay," she said, lifting a hand to cup his chin. A happiness filled her when she both saw and felt his head leaning against her touch. His eyes closed, and he breathed deeply. He felt the most magnificent calm when she surrounded him with her love. "You let me in," she continued, lowering her voice to a whisper. "You helped me understand."

His eyes opened and he sought the final answers in the softness of her eyes.

"So, I'm okay too." Her lips curved again, just at the corners, and only a little.

He sighed contently and pulled her closer to him. Forever grateful he would be for this woman in his life. He kissed the top of her head and tucked it beneath his chin.

"I _do_ need you, you know."

She nodded briefly and bit the softness of her bottom lip.

"I need you to take care of me too," he said, a smile finally starting to spread across his face. Her smile rose into contentment and a happy joy filled her spirit. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Blair," he choked, and she pulled back her head to look into his eyes. "You saved me," he said, lowering his lips to hers for a tender kiss. Her other hand came around and cupped his face to pull him closer. She breathed into his mouth.

"Chuck—"

"I don't want you to leave. Not now, not ever." His piercing stare drew a glittering labyrinth in her deep, brown eyes. "I _need_ you to stay, Blair." He kissed her again, and she reciprocated. "I need you to never leave." His eyes closed against her, and he felt her nod.

"I promise," she said.

The final tension within him released and his arm wrapped around her.

"Go to the cemetery, Chuck."

He blinked. "What?"

"Go to the cemetery. _Really_ say good-bye."

His eyes said it all but the simple nod following gave her her own release. He kissed the corners of her lips and rested his face against the side of her own.

"I love you, Blair," he murmured, getting lost in her hair. She sighed in satisfaction and extended her hand around his neck.

"I love _you_, Chuck Bass."

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A/N: That is all. Please review! I hope you didn't find it unsettling that I had forever words tucked in such as 'always' & 'never', because I know sometimes that's frowned upon in such a young relationship. But I felt it fit. *shrugs* Though I'm still nervous about your reaction. Heh. Let me know! And Merry Christmas! ;p


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